As If You Care . . .

Thinking back on all the rambling stuff I’ve written about here over the past couple of years got me to thinking about how well all of you probably know me. It feels like my life is an open book and that I’m probably more than a bit guilty of over-sharing. Nevertheless, maybe it’s time for all of you to take the . . . .

“How Well Do You Know Peter Milliron” Quiz!

It’s available through this link to my Facebook page. For most of you, NOT taking this lame quiz is probably your option of choice. That’s okay, my feelings won’t be hurt.

For the rest of you here are the questions, just in case you wanna sneak peak . . .

1. I was born in . . .
 Portland, Oregon
 Wenatchee, Washington
 Oakland, California
 Salt Lake City, Utah
 . . . spite of God’s better judgment.

2. I have three sisters. Their names are:
 Connie, Connie and Jane
 Connie, Connie and Elizabeth
 Carla, Carla and Jane
 Carla, Carla and Elizabeth
 Larry, Darryl and my other brother Darryl

3. My favorite book is:
 The DaVinci Code by Dan Brown
 Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry
 A Wrinkle In Time by Madeleine L’Engle
 The World According to Garp by John Irving
 Harry Potter and the Steaming Pile of Crap by Rush Limbaugh

4. My demon-possessed black lab, Rudy, is named after:
 Rudy Ruettiger – the guy in the Notre Dame football movie
 Rudy Giuliani – former mayor of New York
 Rudy Huxtable – the youngest child of Cliff and Claire Huxtable on the Cosby Show
 The Sherlock Holmes phrase: “Rudimentary, my dear Watson.”
 Rutabagas

5. Which of the following is the funniest thing I’ve ever seen / heard / read:
 Superbad
 30 Rock
 Lamb: The Gospel According To Biff, Christ’s Childhood Pal
 Spamalot
 Schindler’s List

6. In the fantasy world I live on, I like to think my sense of humor is a lot like:
 Johnny Carson
 George Carlin
 David Letterman
 John Stewart
 Dick Cheney

7. Which of the following have I NOT done:
 Been a disc jockey
 Gotten lost with my kids in the Old City of Jerusalem at night.
 Pretended to be U.S. Bank CEO Richard Davis on a conference call
 Lived in the Oregon governor’s mansion
 Proudly taken my son’s picture standing next to Britney Spears garbage cans

8. Which of the following songs do I NOT want played at my funeral?
 Money for Nothing by Dire Straits
 Spirit in the Sky by Norman Greenbaum
 If I Had Possession Over Judgment Day by Eric Clapton
 Why Should The Devil Have All The Good Music by Larry Norman
 Don’t Stop Believing by Journey

9. Which of the following phrases are you least likely to hear me say?
 Holy crap!
 You get what you pay for!
 If you’re like me – and I know you’re glad you’re not . . .
 Thanks for coming. Good night and drive safely!
 Only you can prevent forest fires.

10. Which of the following have I NEVER said in church:
 Benny Hinn is a pompous windbag
 May the Force be with you. (And also with you.)
 I’m so glad you could all be here on the Sunday we perform our animal sacrifice!
 Eschatology is the study of edible French snails
 It’s not every church you go to that has a guy playing Led Zeppelin’s Stairway to Heaven on the guitar on Sunday morning!